DC New 52 Week 3

Week three was my most expensive week so far. Wonder Woman and Batman were a must. And, being the Bat completist I am, so were Nightwing, Catwoman and Red Hood and the Outlaws, even though I was pretty sure the latter two would just give me something to shout about. But hey, I like having something to get indignant about. Which I will get to later. Let's start from the best and work our way down.

Wonder Woman

When everyone was busy ranting about how they didn't want the reboot to damage characters like Batman, Superman and the Birds of Prey, no-one really mentioned Wonder Woman. Everyone was just relieved that a reboot meant they could pretend that JMS' disastrous run never happened.

And my God does this pick up the Wonder Woman mythology and run with it. For a long time editors seem to have been scared of her Greek myth origins, fearing that it would scare casual readers away. Well, in a year where a film about a Norse god superhero attracted huge audiences, I think we can all finally agree that's not the case. Brian Azzarello and Cliff Chiang have put Diana right back where she belongs, in a world populated by centaurs and gods with the power to turn party girls into oracles. Superman goes toe-to-toe with the smartest man on earth. So what? Wonder Woman fights gods.

Azzarello's script throws us right into the centre of the action, setting up a great villain in the shape of Apollo and kick-starting the story arc. So many of these new 52 books have been concerned with re-establishing heroes, explaining their histories and motivations with an abundance of thought boxes. Blessedly, Wonder Woman doesn't have a single one. We don't get into Diana's head. We don't know why she's living in London and not Themyscira. The word 'Amazon' isn't even mentioned. Azzarello doesn't bash us over the head with the facts and it's refreshing.

It goes without saying, of course, that Cliff Chiang's art is just gorgeous. I'm a big fan (I'd kill for a commission from him - and in fact I'd have to kill for it, because I certainly couldn't afford it...) He draws Diana as the strong Amazon she is, not as some pretty girl to be fantasised about. His emotional story-telling is great (Zola has a whole heap of brilliant facial expressions) and his action scenes have a great sense of movement.

The storyline this sets up is hugely promising, and it's one I'll definitely stick with. I'm a trades girl, but I think I'll eschew that to keep abreast of Diana's adventures.

Batman

I never read Scott Snyder's run on Detective, but I heard resoundingly good things about it, so his Batman was one of the books in the New 52 that I was sure would be good. And I wasn't wrong.

This is a great Bat book and Snyder nails the Dark Knight and his supporting characters - including Gotham. A clever opening scene shows off Batman's rogues, a blend of classic and modern villains including Two-Face with a more, shall we say, realistic look. Snyder follows this with a glimpse of the Batcave, Alfred, Robins past and present and a typical Bruce Wayne fundraiser. This comic is saying, loud and clear, "everything you love about Batman is still here".

Snyder throws in some nice surprises along the way that I won't spoil here, but this is clearly going to be a title in which you can't always believe what you see. It also sets up an arc that looks set to be cross-over heavy with one other title in particular and which also makes sure that things stay personal for Bats for a little while yet. At the same time we get some funny lines and some excellent Bruce/Dick banter. This book isn't mired in darkness and misery - Bruce, for once, seems to be coming from a more positive place. Perhaps that letter at the end of Flashpoint did him some good.

Greg Capullo's art keeps everything nice and gothic (or perhaps neo-gothic is a better term, given the new WayneTech on display), although he draws Dick too small. And, frankly, when 'Dick Grayson isn't tall enough' is the biggest complaint you have to make, it must be a pretty damn good comic. It may not have got such wide, astounded praise as Wonder Woman but that's just because Batman has been great for years and Snyder and Capullo are just building on some sterling foundations, rather than re-establishing a 'broken' hero.

And, okay, there are thought boxes, but then they're revealed not to be thought boxes, so all is forgiven. I think I will now arbitrarily rate all comics by how many of these boxes they feature.

Nightwing

Well, he already loses points on the thought box scale. There are an awful lot here, drumming home the whole 'I used to be Batman, and before that I was Nightwing/Robin, and before that I was an acrobat and my parents died and I like red-heads...' All the stuff even casual fans know about Dick Grayson (yes, even the red-head thing). I would have liked to see Kyle Higgins forget some of the back-story and get stuck into the action a bit quicker instead.

It's nice to see Dick back as Nightwing and this comic deliberately sets him up as a solo hero, not even featuring cameo appearences from the likes of Bruce and Damien (now that they're no longer partners I like to think that Damien comes up with flimsy reasons to come over and hang out with Dick). The first part of the comic focuses on just how together Dick is, only for him to make a massive mistake later on that costs two police officers their life. And he just shrugs it off. That doesn't really feel like Dick. It would have made more sense (and been more interesting) if his flaws as Nightwing were the result of that fact that he spent months with a sidekick, and he got used to it. He's got to learn how to go solo all over again.

There was nothing particularly bad about this comic, but there wasn't anything to make it really good either. Over the last few years, Dick became one of DCs most prominant and popular characters, and it feels like he's been massively demoted here and landed with a third-tier writer. Snyder wrote him much better over in Batman.

Catwoman

Now we're getting progressively worse. Thought boxes? Plentiful. Bras? Even more so. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that about half the panels in this comic feature bras. Judd Winick has been talking no end about how 'sexy' his Catwoman is, and fans couldn't help but feel he was missing the point. Yes, Catwoman is sexy. But that wouldn't be the first word I'd use to describe her. If you asked Ed Brubaker or Will Pfeifer, her last two writers, I'm sure they'd agree with me over adjectives like resourceful, smart, protective, crusading, witty, loyal, brave, and, yes, sexy. Winick only took one of those on board.

Worst of all, he has somehow failed to understand what makes someone sexy. Showing boob on the first panel isn't sexy. Even the sleaziest of strippers know that something needs to be saved til the end. In fact, that's just it. Catwoman should be sexy in a sophisticated burlesque way, teasing and playing with expectations, making you think she'll give it all up, yet she always leaves with her modesty in place and the audience wanting more. Winick thinks sexy is a back-room stripper who'll go home with you for a tenner.

But that's not even the worst of the comic - in fact, for most of it I was thinking that it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I found the anatomically mind-boggling T&A shots amusing rather than offensive. But then, in the final pages... urgh. I don't want to see Batman and Catwoman having sex. I really, really don't. I want them to flirt on rooftops, kiss a little, and make suggestive comments. I don't want to see them going at it on the floor. And, I'm sorry, but can we have a little inter-comic continuity here? Snyder's Batman would not have sex with Catwoman on the floor of a random penthouse surrounded by kittens and bras.

Frustratingly, there were elements here that were good. Guillem March draws a great Selina (in the one scene that we get to see her out of disguise) and it seems a shame that he didn't have anything else to do with her bar suggestive poses on the other 18 pages. Those kittens were just joyous. I liked Selina's fence Lola as well, she felt real and different. But everything else was basically Judd Winick turning one of DC's three most recognisable female characters into a thoroughly uninspiring, insecure nymphomaniac. Get him off this book as fast as you can.

Red Hood and the Outlaws

And the winner for worst book of the week goes to...

I'll ignore the actual plot (what little there was), the characters of Jason Todd (disappointingly sane) and Roy Harper (disappointingly Ron Weasley), and the abundance of thought boxes and skip straight to my Rant of the Week: What the fuck have they done to Starfire?!?

I'm so angry about it that I'm going to give it a post all of its own straight after this one.

But, while I'm the subject of Red Hood, here's my a quick New Teen Titans in the New 52 update: Here it is revealed that Kory used to be part of a team that including Dick, Vic, Gar, Garth, Lilith and someone called Dustin. No mention of Wally, Donna or Raven. Surely this has to be significant? Surely they're saving these characters for something important down the line, right? Right?!

I also speed-read a couple of other books in my comic shop:

Supergirl: Great art, nice introduction, but it felt more like a prologue than an opening chapter. Frankly, I'd have been pissed off if I'd spent money on something that took 60 seconds to read.

Birds of Prey: I like Starling (although, really, just about everything she did could have been done by Lady Blackhawk) and Black Canary's still bad-ass, but this lacked the wow factor and the sense of cammeraderie that defined Simone's run. That might just be because the full team isn't together yet.

DC Reboot

I've been through all the stages of grief that are to be expected when such monumental news is announced. Some were stronger than other (denial lasted a while and keeps making a comeback) but I'm tentatively feeling my way to acceptance. Thank God we're not going back to year dot and that recent, brilliant characters still have a home (Damien is safe. Phew.) I can see why this is a savvy business decision. To be honest it might even make me start picking up some books (as it stands I read trades rather than comics). But I have a number of requests. Blind hopes, perhaps.

So, DC, pretty pretty please...

Don't get rid of Oracle

Too late for this, perhaps, as it seems a fully-mobile Barbara Gordon is back as Batgirl. Let's scoot right over what this means for Cass and Steph (will they never have been Batgirl in this universe? Will they even exist?) and even ignore the PC implications in getting rid of their only main character who uses a wheelchair. Instead, let's look at what this means for Babs. She was recently voted DC's most kick-ass female by DC Women Kickin Ass. If she had remained Batgirl all this time, she would have been booted out in the preliminaries. Fact is, Babs became infinitely more interesting when she emerged from a pointless and misogynistic editorial edict intended to make her a victim as someone far stronger than the perky cardboard cut out superheroine she had been before. As Oracle she became one of DC's best characters, of any gender or physical ability. Babsgirl, in comparison, is dull and uninspiring.

I'm still hoping that this cover is a fake-out. The background is an Oracle shade of green and Gail Simone's write-up about the series is slightly open to interpretation. Could this actually be the Batgirl online avatar that Grant Morrison teased? Might Babs be some sort of web-only Batgirl, with Steph or Cass still donning the suit in the real world? I will cling to that hope until DC prises it from my sad and disillusioned fingers. Also, the fact that Simone is writing this book also gives me hope - she's the writer largely responsible for why Oracle became so popular.

Don't make Damien well-adjusted

If he's not still an arrogant, stab-happy borderline psychopath I will be sorely disappointed.

Don't cock up the Birds of Prey

Initially I was put off by a man on writing duties (Duane Swiercszynski - who?) but then I remembered that some of my favourite superheroine books were written by men (Palmiotti and Gray on Power Girl, Brubaker on Catwoman) so I got over my blatant sexism. But where is the dream team of Oracle, Black Canary, Huntress and Lady Blackhawk? I'm currently fearful for the fate of the latter two.

Fix Roy Harper

He seems to have both his arms now, which I hope means he also has a daughter in tow. Being a single father was his superhero USP and I liked it. You can keep the drug addict history - I like that too. Kind of excited about seeing him, Red Hood and Starfire in a book together (although I don't like the idea of them turning the gloriously happy Starfire into a 'dark' character) If Cass Cain no longer has a home in the Batfamily, she could do worse than popping up in this book with the fellow screw-ups. Renee Montoya could have a home here too.

Actually follow through when you say that the reboot makes the DCU more diverse

So far I'm not seeing a heck of a lot of diversity, except for Cyborg in JLA and Static Shock getting a book. Oh, and Vixen in JLI. You know how you could make the DCU more diverse? If Red Robin and Superboy were totally doing it.

Bring back Zatanna's fishnets!

And not just because it means my cosplay is already out of date. DC have decided to bring about equality by giving their female characters trousers, in the world's most spectacular failure to grasp the point. The costumes aren't the problem. Wonder Woman's star-spangled knickers are no more ridiculous than Superman's red trunks over blue tights (although it seems those have gone now too). It's an iconic costume, just like Zatanna and Black Canary's fishnets. The problem is that the artists constantly draw women in provocative poses and the writers keep writing them into peril. That's what you need to address. Not Supergirl's miniskirt.

Find awesome things for the following characters to do

Power Girl, Huntress, Lady Blackhawk, Renee Montoya (who should still be The Question, please), Sasha Bordeaux, Donna Troy, Raven, Wally West (is the Flash Barry Allen? Is Kid Flash Bart? Where's Wally?!), Guy Gardner, Ravager, Roy Harper. Also, please take this opportunity to give John Stewart a personality and bring Crispus Allen back. In fact, bring Gotham Central back. Ta!

Keep Secret Six running with no changes whatsoever

I feel very strongly about this one. Obey me or lose me forever, DC.

There are a couple of things that have got me excited. The return of JLI is promising (I loved Giffen's run) and the idea of JLA Dark is far more exciting than the main JLA, as is John Constantine's return to the DCU. I'm also excited about Dick's return as Nightwing, but worried about what will have happened to his brilliant relationship with Damien.

Well done DC, you've got our attention. Now dont piss off the hundreds of thousands of fans who have put many hours and days of our life into the last 25 years of continuity. Pretty please.