TV of 2011

2011 is nearly over, and it's time for me to reflect on the televisual year that was. One thing to note, looking at my list, is that this wasn't a great year for American TV. Having said that, I haven't seen Once Upon A Time yet or American Horror Story, both of which look like they could be good. But out of what aired in 2011 on British TV, here's my top 10, in reverse order for added tension!

10. Misfits series 3

This is much lower down my list than it was last year. Lets be honest, Misfits lost some of its mojo in series three. Was it because Nathan left? Maybe not. Joe Gilgun stole the entire series as "the new guy" Rudy, with his inventive split-personality power, cheerleader phobia and love of frozen treats.In fact, it was the power-swapping that really messed up the show. Their powers were demoted from clever metaphors for the personalities to just a side-note that can be swapped when they need new ones. The new powers, bar Curtis' gender-swapping ability, left little room for exploration. The series makes the list for a few genius things alone: Rudy, Kelly's delivery of "fucking Nazis", the zombie episode and the brilliant, brain-hurting, tear-jerking finale that makes you instantly want to rewatch series 2.

9. Smallville series 10

Here's where it all ended for Smallville, that loyal little show that's been with me my entire adult life. Clark Kent finally donned the red and blue and Lex Luthor returned from the dead (and conveniently lost his memory). Some characters unexpectedly died and some unexpectedly survived. Just about anyone who ever had a role in the show returned, and even if Darkseid was a complete wash-out, who cares? We got Brainiac 5, Emil Hamilton singing Elvis, Hawkman being awesome, Jimmy Olsen returning (and looking an awful lot like his big brother), Michael Hogan back in an eye patch, Justin Hartley dressed as a showgirl and the Superman theme tune. Good times.

8. The Shadow Line

A compelling, grown-up drama, billed (optomistically) as the British Wire. It's not that good, and in fact it occupies a stylised universe all of its own rather than The Wire's brutal realism, but it boasted one of the best casts of the year including the scene-stealer of 2011, Stephen Rea as the unexpectedly terrifying Gatehouse. The resolution was a little odd, but it kept you guessing until the very end with its nicely cyclical twist. In the words of BSG: "All this has happened before..."

7. The Crimson Petal and the White

My obligitory period drama of the year. This dark, disturbing drama is only three episodes long but it will change the way you look at Victorian dramas. It out-Dickens Dickens in the misery stakes and shows just about every character you care about being totally screwed over by the patriarchal Victorian system. Romola Garai's got to be a shoo-in for a BAFTA for her role as justifiably vengeful prostitute Sugar.

6. Fresh Meat

My comedy-drama of the year, this proves that I was onto something all those times that I said someone should make a show about students. Okay, so Kingsley and Josie let the side down a little, but Howard, Oregon, JP and Vod are surely four of the characters of the year. Jack Whitehall surprised everyone by being good (especially since he had the difficult job of making a posh twat loveable) but Zawe Ashton deserves all the plaudits for her intoxicated, bewildered, rambling Vod. It's a rare show where the girls get to be as funny as the boys.

5. The Fades

This was the most exciting new British series of the year and it still doesn't have a second series commissioned. Yes, it loses points because the nerdy banter between the two teen leads is from circa 1999, but a mundane 'I see dead people' show evolved into a daring, morally complex, thrilling drama. Characters drop dead all over the place, Iain De Caestecker and Daniel Kaluuya made a hell of an impact and Angelic Neil was easily the most bat-shit crazy character of the year. If it doesn't get a second series it'll be an outrage.

4. Merlin series 4

This series marked a watershed for the family-friendly show that's grown up with its audience (and cast). The world of the show was turned upside down with episode 3 and gave the show a much-needed shake-up. It's not 'safe' anymore - characters die, betray and get hurt. It still has the odd weak episode and it's a shame that the focus seems to be moving away from Merlin and the compelling Colin Morgan and towards Arthur, but this was their best series yet.

3. Being Human series 3

This was the final series of Being Human as we know it. After the disappointment of series 2, this series really stepped up a gear with Robson Green surprising everyone as a suspicious werewolf, Mitchell going to alarming lengths to protect his dark secrets, and the ticking time bomb that is amnesiac Herrick in the attic. Series 3 was 6 episodes of pure tension with a heart-wrenching finale that brings everything back to the central relationship between the werewolf, the ghost, and the vampire who, try as he might, was always just a little bit less human than them.

2. Doctor Who series 6

The Moffat/Smith dream-team really hit their stride this year, with Matt Smith just getting better and better, Karen Gillan finally making Amy likeable and Alex Kingston and Arthur Darvill doing sterling work. This was the year of the River Song mystery, but it was two intelligent, powerful stand-alone episodes by Neil Gaiman and Tom McRae that the series will really be remembered for.

1. Game of Thrones

The most addictive, compelling new show of the year, stuffed with cliffhangers and jaw-droppng shocks (for those of us who haven't read the books). It's fantasy in the same way that BSG was sci-fi, in that it's really about politics and human nature. It's gorgeous to look at and boasts an amazing cast (albeit one that gets killed off at a rate of knots), and is the best show on TV for playing 'spot the obscure British TV actor' (it's Chris from Skins! It's that bird off Hollyoaks! It's... Jerome Flynn?!?) I'm eagerly anticipating series 2.

What's happened to Merlin?

 
Merlin has always been one of my chief guilty pleasures, emphasis on 'guilty'. It's the sort of thing you create entire cover stories for. "I'm just going upstairs to watch, erm, a DVD", or "I just stumbled across it, I'm not really watching it". But now, with series four getting better viewing figures than ever (helped, admittedly, by a lacklustre showing from X Factor), it's actually getting close to Doctor Who-level viewing figures, but still with half the critical praise and about a tenth of the column inches. (And don't get me wrong, I'm not saying Merlin is better than Doctor Who - I'm not going that far!) Merlin is one of the very few shows to have grown year-on-year, gaining in popularity all the time, and actually getting better as it grows up. Most shows are a shadow of their former self by their fourth year, while Merlin just seems to be shedding puppy fat.

When it started it was one of a raft of Saturday tea-time shows that sprung up to replicate Doctor Who's success. Where Robin Hood, Demons and, to a lesser extent, Primeval failed, Merlin kept going. It was a simple idea, kind of a Smallville-does-Camelot, exploring the famous characters of Arthurian myth when they were ridiculously hot 20-somethings. Merlin and Guinevere are servants while Arthur and Morgana are spoilt royals, living under the roof of the all-controlling, magic-hating King Uther. The creators cast largely unknowns, with Richard Wilson drafted in as Gaius to tempt the older fans and Anthony Head as Uther to appeal to the nerds. The show cleaved to a quest-of-the-week format and managed some impressive special effects and action sequences. But the makers soon realised that it wasn't the monsters or Morgana's impossibly gorgeous gowns that were drawing in the viewers - it was the chemistry between Merlin and Arthur.

By the end of series one it was clear that Colin Morgan could act a bit (hell, any Whovian could've told you after his brief showing in the episode Midnight that he could act). The jury, however, was still out on Bradley James' Arthur. He was good in the part, but I'm not sure that cocky, series one Arthur was much of a stretch for him. What was undeniable, though, was that somehow magic happened when the two of them were on screen together. They bounced off each other effortlessly, playing to each other's comic strengths and creating a touching, slow-build and very British friendship that practically defines bromance.

The one accusation, though, was that nothing ever changed in the world of Merlin. Morgana never goes evil, Arthur never becoems king and no-one ever finds out that Merlin has magic. But come series four - well, two out of three ain't bad. Morgana, after spending all of series three slinking around the castle doing sneaky things and unleashing her Smirk of Evil, is now living in a witchy shack, wearing a tonne of black lace and plotting world domination. It might not be an entirely believable character transition, but Katie McGrath is undoubtedlty having a whale of a time and has actually come into her own this series. (I've also just seen a video of her raving about Firefly and Nathan Fillion, so she's alright in my book!)

And as for 'King' Arthur, the show's biggest ever change came in one bold - but necessary - move: they killed off Uther. Anthony Head has been missed, but his death not only provided one of the most tear-jerking moments in the show, but it allowed Bradley James to finally prove that he's picked up some acting chops along the way. It was a stunning, Howard Overman-penned episode, perfectly balancing the tonal ups and downs before ending it with the spectacularly feel-good moment of Arthur's coronation, and Merlin's proud, shining face yelling "long live the king!" many shows would have saved that for the final moment of the final episode, up there with Clark Kent dashing out of the Daily Planet and ripping his shirt open to reveal the S shield on his chest. Merlin, however, knocked it out in episode three of series four.

It marked a watershed for the show. This series, airing at the later time of 8pm, has been noticeably darker. Gone are the silly fart gags of earlier series', replaced instead by torture, death and betrayal. The Guinevere/Lancelot plot has also been carried out now, even if they did cop out by introducing an element of magical control. I guess they just figured that kids wouldn't be able to quite get their head around Gwen loving two men at the same time, which is fair enough. The Knights have had a bigger role to play this series, and Adetomiwa Edun even got the chance to show us that he's not as bland as his character would often have you believe.

Which isn't to say that comedy has been abandoned altogether. A Servant of Two Masters is basically a comedy tour de force from Colin Morgan playing about three different characters and the writers seem to have been doing more slash-baiting than ever this series, including a roll around in bed, a trouserless tussle and, in a move which must surely be the pinnacle of all slash-baiting ever, a trouserless Arthur spinning Merlin around over a table to get at something he's hiding behind his back. Honestly, they're just seeing how much they can get away with.

But they've kept Merlin and Arthur's relationship at the forefront, even with all the Gwen/Lancelot stuff going on. Merlin might be a sword and sorcery show, but the thing that gives it crossover appeal is that what it's really about is two best mates, winding each other up, bickering, defending each other and being very reluctant to do anything quite so girlie as actually admit that they're friends. In an American show they would hug and declare manly hetero love for each other. In a British show, they just take the piss out of each other relentlessly. It might just be the best portrayal of a quintessentially British friendship ever.

The series four finale may even break the third Merlin taboo, and have Arthur actually find out that his loyal servant is the most powerful sorceror in the world and can also control dragons, you know, just for good measure. But then what would they have left to do in series five? Which, already, I can't wait for. Finally, Merlin is good enough that I can actually list it as one of my favourite shows without adding "yes, I know it's a kids show" or "I only watch it because they're hot". Hooray!

Smallville - Providing guilty pleasure since 2001

Remember when Smallville first started? The outcry over Lex Luthor being Clark's teenhood best friend? The cringing at the over-egged dialogue and tiresome freak-of-the-week guest stars? Well, somewhere along the way Smallville became the longest running continuous sci-fi series of all time. I've spent ten years of my life laughing out loud at ridiculous plot developments and Tom Welling's uncanny resemblance to a red setter and declaring that it really is an awful programme. But somehow, despite (or possibly because of) all of that it became one of my favourite shows. And tomorrow its final ever episode airs in the UK. So just how did the show that gave us the frankly insane Lana-as-evil-reincarnated-witch arc become such an institution?

Well, it's Superman, isn't it? That guarantees an audience right off the bat. Hell, that's the only reason I watched it, so I could point at the screen and go "hey, it's Perry White/J'onn Jonz/Ma Hunkel!" But for the first few series you'd be forgiven for not even realising that it was a Superman show were it not for the regular shots of the Kent Farm sign and the lumps of green rock everywhere. The meteor freaks were a canny idea initially, but one that quickly made the show a little stale.

In fact, the show only really stepped up a gear once it found the confidence to embrace its comic book roots and start introducing recognisable heroes and villains like Aquaman, Green Arrow and Brainiac. But it seems a shame to disregard the weaker, repetitive high school series' for one very big reason:

Lex Luthor.

The character whose inclusion caused the most ire among the fans was probably the thing that saved the show from cancellation. Or more accurately, Michael Rosenbaum was. Despite a script that never once remembered that Lex is the smartest man on earth, and which had him pinballing between good and evil twice an episode, Rosenbaum somehow managed to turn in the best portrayal of Luthor yet seen on screen. His development from unloved, lonely but somehow hopeful young man into the supervillain of legend was far more interesting than Clark's development into Superman.

He was helped by John Glover's bonkers, over-annunciating performance as the gloriously-haired Lionel Luthor, and between them the two of them created the most compelling moments of the show, from Lionel realising just how badly he's damaged his son in the brilliant Memoria to Lex declaring "No one will even remember your name" before Lionel takes an unplanned dive off LuthorCorp.

Unfortunately, Rosenbaum was so good that he skewed the balance of the show. As far as I was concerned, Lex was a lovely bloke before Clark came along and made him evil. It's a shame the writers lacked the patience to show Lex on a slightly more believable descent into bitterness, jealousy and villainry. Instead, they just decided somewhere between series five and six 'okay, he's a baddie now'. It's no surprise really that Rosenbaum jumped ship after series seven.

But, in a strange way, his departure actually evened the show out. It forced the rest of the cast to step up. And while Tom Welling never became a great actor (he did become a pretty good director though...) the others all over time really upped their games. Rosenbaum's departure also coincided more or less with Lana's, which was the best thing that ever happened to Smallville.

With the high school chaff well and truly sorted (Sam Jones III's awful Pete Ross didn't even make it to graduation) Smallville was - after a brief and disasterous flirtation with college - able to finally grow up. Allison Mack's always brilliant Chloe shouldered the heavy emoting while Erica Durance's Lois evolved from an annoyance to the driven, spunky reporter of legend. With the addition of the excellent Justin Hartley's Oliver Queen (he of the flawless comic timing and rarely-clothed chest) the cast moved into something approaching, well, good.

In its last few years Smallville often ran with arcs that never quite worked (Doomsday) and special guests that spectacularly failed to be special (Black Canary was awful - no wonder they did away with her relationship with Ollie), but it finally rose above the tackiness that mired it in earlier series'. It pulled off a stone-cold classic with the should-have-been-terrible Justice Society two-parter. It even made Hawkman cooler than he's even been in comics.

In the latter half of the Smallville's run, I found myself wishing the show would become more of an ensemble piece and give more screen time to excellent bit-part players like Phil Morris as the criminally under-used John Jones, Kyle Gallner as Bart Allen, Pam Grier's Amanda Waller, Eric Martsolf as Booster Gold and Alessandro Juliani's Emil Hamilton. But the show always stuck a little too closely to its main character - Clark. Which didn't stop Justin Hartley from gleefully stealing the show on more than one occassion.

Smallville always punched above its weight visually, with gorgeous cinematography and excellent special effects. It took a while for the production team to put as much effort into the scripts and actors, but eventually they did and after ten years I have developed a respect for a show that I used to laugh at and now laugh with. It's even given me some geek-out moments to treasure, loving nods to the hardcore fans like Lex's nightmare vision of himself as a white-suited President and the line "Perhaps Brainiac 5 will be an improvement."

I can't believe that Warner Bros haven't already rushed to fill the Smallville-shaped hole with a Justice League spin-off. It's a shame that DC, for now, have lost an ideal gateway to bring new fans into their universe. I never thought I would one day lament the loss of Tom Welling from my TV schedule. But I'm really going to miss Smallville.

Un-mystifying the purple lady of the DCU

Since DC launched their New52, there's been one question on people's lips: just who is that purple hooded woman?

She first appeared in Flashpoint as the new DC universe was brought into existance.

And then she went on to appear in every single issue number 1 in the first month of the DC reboot, as if checking on her handiwork.

Who was she? An obscure Wildstorm character? A reimagined existing DC character (I briefly wondered if it might be a re-done Raven)? A convenient re-set button if DC decide their risky reboot has failed?

But then I stumbled upon an answer. While reading For Tomorrow, the 2004-5 Superman arc by Brian Azzerello and Jim Lee, I turned the page and what did I see? (Apologies for the quality - no scanner...)

It's a purple hooded woman with marks on her face.

And look, she has a glowing purple aura too!

She's a witch called Halcyon. Beyond that... I don't really know. She's Middle Eastern and seemed to have it in for Superman, who accidentally worsened the war in her country. But all I know of her is what was in For Tomorrow. I haven't seen her in anything before or since. If I Google 'Halcyon DC Comics' she doesn't pop up anywhere. It's almost as if the universe has been re-written and she's vanished from it...

So, I think the guessing games might be over. The mysterious purple lady of the DCnU is Halcyon. Or someone massively ripping off her appearence.

DC New 52 - Week 4

The final week in the issue-by-issue reveal of DC's brave new world. We've seen Barbara Gordon walk again, a dramatic change for the Joker, a new direction for Wonder Woman, a disturbing Cat/Bat sex scene, exploding babies and lots and lots of bras and thought boxes. So what does the final week bring?

Aquaman

Reboot or not, I never thought anyone could ever get me to buy an Aquaman book. And they didn't. I read it quickly in the shop. (I was buying four other comics, okay?! They got plenty of money off me) But here's a shocker, possibly the biggest shocker of the New 52. Geoff Johns might have actually made Aquaman... cool. Sort of. Almost.

Johns has done the only thing that could have been done: he acknowledged that Aquaman is a joke. And it's not just us real-world folk who think so. This comic is littered with people asking AC how it feels to be the laughing stock hero, asking him if he needs a glass of water and gaping when he orders fish and chips (Americans have fish and chips? This is massive news.) He spends the entire comic looking slightly pissed off.

He has a sexy new look (although the ridiculous orange and green costume somehow survived the reboot) and Johns seems to have wisely scrapped the Atlantean angle, focusing instead on the fact that Aquaman is half-human. If anyone can make the character work, it's Johns. So, it might not be long before Aquaman actually becomes one of the DC big-hitters.

The Fury of Firestorm

I picked this one up just because Gail Simone's name was on the cover. I have no love for the character and, I've got to be honest, after reading it I still don't. Two teenagers bitch at each other, wonder if the tension may be racial, get superpowers and try to blow each other up. I never felt the conflict between the characters and the fact that, once empowered, they attacked each other rather than the gun-wielding villains was just bizarre.

Yildiray Cinar's art is good and one page showing Jason and Ronnie having family meals hinted at the more subtle path the comic could have gone down, but frankly this is a bit of a mess. I don't expect to have all questions answered at the end of each number one, but The Fury of Firestorm just bewildered me and left me unengaged.

I, Vampire

The extent of my knowledge of the character of vampire Andrew was (the brilliant) Doctor 13: Architecture and Morality. So you'll understand why I was surprised that, 1. He was getting a comic in the reboot, and 2. That it was getting good reviews.

I picked it up, not wanting to miss out like I did with Animal Man and Swamp Thing, and I'm glad I did. Moody art, interesting take on the vampire mythology, and ticking boxes both for people who like their vamps romantic and those who like them blood thirsty.

I'm not entirely sure where this comic is going to go (surely any one of the three Justice Leagues would soon be on hand to put down a vampire uprising?) but the central relationship between the two warring lovers was compelling and it could be an interesting addition to the DC catalogue - albeit a quiet one.

Justice League Dark

This is one I was really looking forward to, and my opinion on it may be clouded by the fact that I desperately want it to be good. But I really enjoyed it.

It's not perfect and some of the dialogue is clunky, but it's stuffed full of weird and wonderful ideas (and the most inventive motorway pile-up I've ever seen) and nicely sets up the tone and plot of the series. Xanadu, Zatanna and Shade are sketched out nicely here and John Constantine makes a helluva entrance (although I'm concerned that they're setting him up more as a conman than a mage).

Mikel Janin's art is lovely and the book has done enough to hook me. Unlike the other team book of the week...

Teen Titans

I love Teen Titans and I came to this book already pissed off that it was getting a hard reboot. I was concerned that not only were DC wiping out the New Teen Titans, they were also messing with the chemistry of the most successful TT line-up since the Perez/Wolfman era: Tim Drake, Wonder Girl, Superboy and Kid Flash (and Ravager, who I can only hope will return one day to her rughtful place as a Titan).

It remains to be seen whether they will eventually recapture this chemistry - as of the end of this book the 'team' only consists of Tim and Cassie, and they're not exactly getting on. But, from what I've seen so far, I'm not enthused by this book. After the disaster that was Red Hood and the Outlaws, Scott Lobdell manages not to do anything horribly offensive in his first issue, but he also fails to do anything exciting. Tim is still in character (although the wings are just as bad as you'd expect) and Bart's homemade costume is a cute touch. Cassie is just an Angry Young Woman.

And as for the art... urgh. So very dated.

It's impossible to tell how this book will go in the long term as only half the team actually showed up. We still have no idea who - or what -  the new characters are. The most interesting part of the whole book were brief computer clips of Miss Martian, Solstice and - New Teen Titans Watch alert - Raven, the first indication that those characters still exist in rebooted DCU. Which is good news.


I'm still wondering if I made a mistake by not picking up The Flash and All-Star Western, both of which have had excellent reviews. I may go back for those two...

How do you solve a problem like Starfire?

Starfire is a character that, admittedly, few writers and artists have got right since Perez and Wolfman. But none have got her quite as wrong as Scott Lobdell and Kenneth Rocafort in Red Hood and the Outlaws. Starfire comes from a planet of nudist free-lovers. This we know. Starfire likes sex and isn't ashamed of it. For some reason Lobdell and Rocafort take this to mean that she is an unemotional sexbot. No. Starfire is not a slut. There is something beautifully pure and pre-lapsarian about her attitude to sex, she sees the body as something to celebrate and be proud of. This doesn't mean she'd have sex with just anyone, and she certainly would never cheat on someone.

New T&A Kory



And as for the idea that people aren't important to Kory, and that she doesn't even remember Dick, that's just ridiculous. Kory loves openly and without fear of rejection. She's often too affectionate. And that was what was always so distinctive about Kory - she's a stunningly beautiful woman but her levels of affection make her almost goofy. She's had a crap history as an abused prisoner, but retains the capacity for optimism. That makes (made) her one of the strongest (and most often overlooked) heroines in the DCU.

Old pro-love Kory

It has emerged that DC had words with Lobdell about how sexualised he made Kory. They wanted him to suggest that it might be the result of post-traumatic-stress after her history as a sex slave, but he was adament that he didn't want her to be defined by that. SO WHY MAKE HER COMPLETELY DEFINED BY HER LOVE OF SEX? Why have her do everything Jason asks her without questioning it? Why have both her arse and boobs in every picture of her?

Why not have her just being happy, joyous Kory, a fun counterpoint to brooding recovering drug addict Roy and brooding recovering psychopath Jason? If she was chirpy and upbeat and then slaughtered a tonne of mercenaries in tanks, that would be interesting. Because Kory is a warrier when she has to be, and she never had a problem with killing bad people. I'm not saying have her cover up and become a prude, and she should absolutely hit on Roy and Jason. In fact, she should make the same objectifying comments about them that they make about her. She would act as a great destabiliser in the comic, someone the boys don't quite get and are a little scared of. Happy one minute, cheerful nympho the next, hugging them and declaring her team mate love for them the second after that. Then slaughtering a tonne of mercenaries in tanks.

It worries me that some creators choose not to see past the 'likes sex' aspect of Kory's personality. It's not just a guy thing. She was created by two men who also happened to establish three of DC's best female characters (two of whom are now MIA). Men can write Kory. But many see her exclusively through a male gaze. In Red Hood it's a triple-filtered male gaze: she's gazed at and commented on by the male characters and defined by the male creators for what they clearly assume to be a male audience (even though, in my experience, Jason and Roy's fans are mostly female). I love all three characters in this book - or, at least, what they used to be - which makes me their key audience. But I simply don't feel like I can read this. And it's not just a crusading feminist thing - I've read plenty of comments by male fans who feel the same way. They actually find Kory less sexy now.

Thank God that Wonder Woman, Supergirl and Birds of Prey also came out this week, otherwise with this and Catwoman (which I ranted about in the below post) I'd be accusing DC of actively driving away female readers. But, as it is, DC put out a lot of books featuring women this week. Most of them were good and presented their female characters as strong and rounded. But so long as comics like Red Hood and Catwoman keep coming out, comics are never going to shake off the 'just for boys' tag. Cut your loses on those two very quickly, DC. I'll be surprised if the creative teams stay in place for more than six issues.

DC New 52 Week 3

Week three was my most expensive week so far. Wonder Woman and Batman were a must. And, being the Bat completist I am, so were Nightwing, Catwoman and Red Hood and the Outlaws, even though I was pretty sure the latter two would just give me something to shout about. But hey, I like having something to get indignant about. Which I will get to later. Let's start from the best and work our way down.

Wonder Woman

When everyone was busy ranting about how they didn't want the reboot to damage characters like Batman, Superman and the Birds of Prey, no-one really mentioned Wonder Woman. Everyone was just relieved that a reboot meant they could pretend that JMS' disastrous run never happened.

And my God does this pick up the Wonder Woman mythology and run with it. For a long time editors seem to have been scared of her Greek myth origins, fearing that it would scare casual readers away. Well, in a year where a film about a Norse god superhero attracted huge audiences, I think we can all finally agree that's not the case. Brian Azzarello and Cliff Chiang have put Diana right back where she belongs, in a world populated by centaurs and gods with the power to turn party girls into oracles. Superman goes toe-to-toe with the smartest man on earth. So what? Wonder Woman fights gods.

Azzarello's script throws us right into the centre of the action, setting up a great villain in the shape of Apollo and kick-starting the story arc. So many of these new 52 books have been concerned with re-establishing heroes, explaining their histories and motivations with an abundance of thought boxes. Blessedly, Wonder Woman doesn't have a single one. We don't get into Diana's head. We don't know why she's living in London and not Themyscira. The word 'Amazon' isn't even mentioned. Azzarello doesn't bash us over the head with the facts and it's refreshing.

It goes without saying, of course, that Cliff Chiang's art is just gorgeous. I'm a big fan (I'd kill for a commission from him - and in fact I'd have to kill for it, because I certainly couldn't afford it...) He draws Diana as the strong Amazon she is, not as some pretty girl to be fantasised about. His emotional story-telling is great (Zola has a whole heap of brilliant facial expressions) and his action scenes have a great sense of movement.

The storyline this sets up is hugely promising, and it's one I'll definitely stick with. I'm a trades girl, but I think I'll eschew that to keep abreast of Diana's adventures.

Batman

I never read Scott Snyder's run on Detective, but I heard resoundingly good things about it, so his Batman was one of the books in the New 52 that I was sure would be good. And I wasn't wrong.

This is a great Bat book and Snyder nails the Dark Knight and his supporting characters - including Gotham. A clever opening scene shows off Batman's rogues, a blend of classic and modern villains including Two-Face with a more, shall we say, realistic look. Snyder follows this with a glimpse of the Batcave, Alfred, Robins past and present and a typical Bruce Wayne fundraiser. This comic is saying, loud and clear, "everything you love about Batman is still here".

Snyder throws in some nice surprises along the way that I won't spoil here, but this is clearly going to be a title in which you can't always believe what you see. It also sets up an arc that looks set to be cross-over heavy with one other title in particular and which also makes sure that things stay personal for Bats for a little while yet. At the same time we get some funny lines and some excellent Bruce/Dick banter. This book isn't mired in darkness and misery - Bruce, for once, seems to be coming from a more positive place. Perhaps that letter at the end of Flashpoint did him some good.

Greg Capullo's art keeps everything nice and gothic (or perhaps neo-gothic is a better term, given the new WayneTech on display), although he draws Dick too small. And, frankly, when 'Dick Grayson isn't tall enough' is the biggest complaint you have to make, it must be a pretty damn good comic. It may not have got such wide, astounded praise as Wonder Woman but that's just because Batman has been great for years and Snyder and Capullo are just building on some sterling foundations, rather than re-establishing a 'broken' hero.

And, okay, there are thought boxes, but then they're revealed not to be thought boxes, so all is forgiven. I think I will now arbitrarily rate all comics by how many of these boxes they feature.

Nightwing

Well, he already loses points on the thought box scale. There are an awful lot here, drumming home the whole 'I used to be Batman, and before that I was Nightwing/Robin, and before that I was an acrobat and my parents died and I like red-heads...' All the stuff even casual fans know about Dick Grayson (yes, even the red-head thing). I would have liked to see Kyle Higgins forget some of the back-story and get stuck into the action a bit quicker instead.

It's nice to see Dick back as Nightwing and this comic deliberately sets him up as a solo hero, not even featuring cameo appearences from the likes of Bruce and Damien (now that they're no longer partners I like to think that Damien comes up with flimsy reasons to come over and hang out with Dick). The first part of the comic focuses on just how together Dick is, only for him to make a massive mistake later on that costs two police officers their life. And he just shrugs it off. That doesn't really feel like Dick. It would have made more sense (and been more interesting) if his flaws as Nightwing were the result of that fact that he spent months with a sidekick, and he got used to it. He's got to learn how to go solo all over again.

There was nothing particularly bad about this comic, but there wasn't anything to make it really good either. Over the last few years, Dick became one of DCs most prominant and popular characters, and it feels like he's been massively demoted here and landed with a third-tier writer. Snyder wrote him much better over in Batman.

Catwoman

Now we're getting progressively worse. Thought boxes? Plentiful. Bras? Even more so. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that about half the panels in this comic feature bras. Judd Winick has been talking no end about how 'sexy' his Catwoman is, and fans couldn't help but feel he was missing the point. Yes, Catwoman is sexy. But that wouldn't be the first word I'd use to describe her. If you asked Ed Brubaker or Will Pfeifer, her last two writers, I'm sure they'd agree with me over adjectives like resourceful, smart, protective, crusading, witty, loyal, brave, and, yes, sexy. Winick only took one of those on board.

Worst of all, he has somehow failed to understand what makes someone sexy. Showing boob on the first panel isn't sexy. Even the sleaziest of strippers know that something needs to be saved til the end. In fact, that's just it. Catwoman should be sexy in a sophisticated burlesque way, teasing and playing with expectations, making you think she'll give it all up, yet she always leaves with her modesty in place and the audience wanting more. Winick thinks sexy is a back-room stripper who'll go home with you for a tenner.

But that's not even the worst of the comic - in fact, for most of it I was thinking that it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. I found the anatomically mind-boggling T&A shots amusing rather than offensive. But then, in the final pages... urgh. I don't want to see Batman and Catwoman having sex. I really, really don't. I want them to flirt on rooftops, kiss a little, and make suggestive comments. I don't want to see them going at it on the floor. And, I'm sorry, but can we have a little inter-comic continuity here? Snyder's Batman would not have sex with Catwoman on the floor of a random penthouse surrounded by kittens and bras.

Frustratingly, there were elements here that were good. Guillem March draws a great Selina (in the one scene that we get to see her out of disguise) and it seems a shame that he didn't have anything else to do with her bar suggestive poses on the other 18 pages. Those kittens were just joyous. I liked Selina's fence Lola as well, she felt real and different. But everything else was basically Judd Winick turning one of DC's three most recognisable female characters into a thoroughly uninspiring, insecure nymphomaniac. Get him off this book as fast as you can.

Red Hood and the Outlaws

And the winner for worst book of the week goes to...

I'll ignore the actual plot (what little there was), the characters of Jason Todd (disappointingly sane) and Roy Harper (disappointingly Ron Weasley), and the abundance of thought boxes and skip straight to my Rant of the Week: What the fuck have they done to Starfire?!?

I'm so angry about it that I'm going to give it a post all of its own straight after this one.

But, while I'm the subject of Red Hood, here's my a quick New Teen Titans in the New 52 update: Here it is revealed that Kory used to be part of a team that including Dick, Vic, Gar, Garth, Lilith and someone called Dustin. No mention of Wally, Donna or Raven. Surely this has to be significant? Surely they're saving these characters for something important down the line, right? Right?!

I also speed-read a couple of other books in my comic shop:

Supergirl: Great art, nice introduction, but it felt more like a prologue than an opening chapter. Frankly, I'd have been pissed off if I'd spent money on something that took 60 seconds to read.

Birds of Prey: I like Starling (although, really, just about everything she did could have been done by Lady Blackhawk) and Black Canary's still bad-ass, but this lacked the wow factor and the sense of cammeraderie that defined Simone's run. That might just be because the full team isn't together yet.